~ "EXIT" Lyrics ~
Page Jumps:
morning fog
On the "first date" he came to my house
We watched a movie but not on the couch
He stole my first kiss like he was a poser
Then in a month it was pretty much over
A text for a breakup, it gave me no closure
Went to a park for a first and last date
I showed up first and he showed up late
We went on a hike nearby
He talked the whole time
He kissed me with tongue and then said goodbye
New boy at a new park, and it was great
Best I could've asked for, like it was fate
First guy I said "I love you" to
But 50 days gone, I had no clue
He ghosted that summer, and colored me blue
Like a morning fog, new boy blinded me
Couple of red flags I chose not to see
Loved him for 3 months and still love him now
Trying to stay friends but I don't know how
But I need him in my life, so I'll let myself drown
moth to flame
I am to you as
a moth is to flame
You are too beautiful
But hurt me just the same
You shine to me with ephemerality
Before I get burned and you leave
Loving you seems to be self harm
You left me wingless, only with my arms
You burn up my wings when they touch you
You light up my night when it's past curfew
I just can't help myself, love is my virtue
You say I'm pressuring you, that's so true
Only in your head where delusion is the truth
Mine is the same but the delusion is loving you
I wanna say "fuck this fire" and get out
But now I'm too tired to move around
Spaces we shared
Beds, baths, and food
Your warmth ensnared
My body, mind, and mood
You burn up my wings when they touch you
You light up my night when it's past curfew
I just can't help myself, love is my virtue
You say I'm pressuring you, that's so true
Only in your head where delusion is the truth
Mine is the same but the delusion is loving you
I wanna say "fuck this fire" and get out
But now I'm too tired to move around
I could blow out the flame but I don't want to
I could crawl away but I can't
You want to keep me around, don't you?
It's burning me to ash and sand
You burn up my wings when they touch you
You light up my night when it's past curfew
I just can't help myself, love is my virtue
You say I'm pressuring you, that's so true
Only in your head where delusion is the truth
Mine is the same but the delusion is loving you
I wanna say "fuck this fire" and get out
But now I'm too tired to move around
(You burn up my wings)
(You burn them)
(You burn them)
perennials
Your towel's hanging near
For when you'd shower here
A reminder of what we shared
I wonder if you even care
Even though I saw you cry
And I saw it in your eyes
You care about me too
But I never trust the truth
Tell me you love me
Say that you miss me
I know you're thinking of me so
Come back and kiss me
Get your shit together
Or you'll lose me forever
Grow us back in spring
Water our perennials and fix everything
When I was your sweetheart
I felt like we were pure art
But now maybe we weren't
Now I feel I've learned
We always had trouble growing
Through all of the weeds
You said you wouldn't be going
But I don't know where this leads
Tell me you love me
Say that you miss me
I know you're thinking of me so
Come back and kiss me
Get your shit together
Or you'll lose me forever
Grow us back in spring
Water our perennials and
Tell me you miss me
Say that you'll kiss me
I know you're thinking of me so
Come back and love me
Get your shit together
Or you'll lose me forever
Grow us back in spring
Water our perennials and fix everything
The lightning and the rain came down
On our flowers in this small town
All the gifts on earth can't fix my heart
But I still want nothing to tear us apart
Tell me you love me
Say that you miss me
I know you're thinking of me so
Come back and kiss me
Get your shit together
Or you'll lose me forever
Grow us back in spring
Water our perennials and
Tell me you miss me
Say that you'll kiss me
I know you're thinking of me so
Come back and love me
Get your shit together
Or you'll lose me forever
Grow us back in spring
Water our perennials and fix everything
bad things
I used to believe
That karma's real
But after all this
That's not how I feel
How can I believe
That justice gets served
When the villains get their way?
They don't get what they deserve
Good things always happen to bad people
I wish it wasn't true
Bad things always happen to good people
So what the hell can I do?
I used to believe
That karma's real
But after all this
That's not how I feel
How can I trust
That good things come
When the suffering never ends?
I'd rather just be numb
Good things always happen to bad people
I wish it wasn't true
Bad things always happen to good people
So what the hell can I do?
Bad things always happen to good people
So what the hell can I do?
Good things always happen to bad people
I wish it wasn't true
Bad things always happen to good people
So what the hell can I do?
Karma sounds nice
The idea does entice
If only it were real
That's how I feel
FLAKE
What's the fun
In every body being shallow?
I'm so done
With everybody staying callow
Oh I can't take
A paperweight
To be a mate
It's just so fake
Don't want a flake
For god's sake
If you're gonna talk to me only when you're wanting fun
I don't wanna be the one
Why don't many people wanna know me?
Why don't many people wanna care?
Not just stay around to enjoy my comedy
I've got so much love to share
Oh I can't take
A paperweight
To be a mate
It's just so fake
Don't want a flake
For god's sake
If you're gonna talk to me only when you're wanting fun
Don't want the jokes
If you're gonna choke
When I come to you for comfort, and you only ever run
I don't wanna be the one
I don't wanna be the one, one
I don't wanna be the one, one
If you're gonna talk to me only when you're wanting fun
I don't wanna be the one
favorite child
I am my mother's child
I try to fix everyone's shit
If a man comes to my life
I fear he'll leave in a fit
My brother always stole the spotlight
Inhaled all the air in the dining room
He's the mess so I must be the best
it's sending me an air of doom
I try I try I try
To be the favorite child
I make sandcastles from gravel
Exhausted, I unravel
I cry I cry I cry
Because of the war in my mind
I try my best, but I'm reviled
I die to be the favorite child
I'm the only grandchild left now
I've gotta help out but the voices are loud
My problems aren't visible to the naked eye
Except when the salt comes out and I cry
I've got some obsessions
I need to leave good impressions
It feels like I fail every time
Makes me wonder why, but I still try
I try I try I try
To be the favorite child
I make sandcastles from gravel
Exhausted, I unravel
I cry I cry I cry
Because of the war in my mind
I try my best, but I'm reviled
I die to be the favorite child
Never had a strong father figure
So many men strike my trigger
They come and they go
I run and I hit low
I'm so tired of trying
To keep the family together
I fail and I'm dying
Got temperamental weather
I will never be the favorite
A tale so old, it's fucking ancient
I will never be enough for anyone
The expectations can't be outdone
I try I try I try
To be the favorite child
I make sandcastles from gravel
Exhausted, I unravel
I cry I cry I cry
Because of the war in my mind
I try my best, but I'm reviled
I die to be the favorite child
poppy
I'll bring a poppy to the stone
On a windy day my hair will be blown
I'll shed a single tear for us
And later I could toast to a lack of trust
I wish that I could hate you
But that's something I'd never do
So in the night when I lie alone in bed
I cry myself to sleep and dream of poppy red
(Poppy red)
(Poppy red)
Red was only meaning for the color in my eyes
I am only grieving the bond we had as it dies
Left the flower on our grave as a bright red
One day I'll return and see my poppy dead
styx
I miss you
I miss you
I miss you
I'd wait for you
I fell for you
Then hit the cold ground
You didn't catch me
Scraped up my body
Stumbled on my roses
Then planted more seeds
Water them one day
Then step on them like weeds
If I'm a cloud, I'm pouring
When you step on the plants
Tryna water them with my tears
And you're stuck in a trance
I cry for you
I cry for us
I cry at dawn
I cry at dusk
I'm in the deep
I'm in the dark
I can't sleep
With my broken heart
Tell me what you want for us
Tell me why I never trust
You
I'm all dried out
I cried for us
I'm all tired out
I think I'm dust
You turned back
You turned back
You turned back
You turned back
the thorn
Sometimes I think we could've had it all
I rarely think about your lack of balls
But when there's a moment that I just do
I feel I could've made a life with you
If you really were at all brave like me
Our ship would have sailed beautifully
Like a thorn it's stabbing, stabbing to me
It's a painful reminder to me, see?
I ignore the thorn in my side
I try not to adorn our past life
It could've not given us the blues
But the one who broke my heart is you
Trying not to get cut in the bushes
Fucking crying face down in my cushions
Blood is racing down my face and body
I'm missing you at my birthday party
Cause a year ago you spent the night here
Kinda wish a guy like you would appear
Puberty has been a fucking prison
Wish I could lock problems in a prism
I ignore the thorn in my side
I try not to adorn our past life
It could've not given us the blues
But the one who broke my trust is you
I ignore the thorn in my side
I try not to adorn our past life
It could've been our future too
But the one who bailed on us is you
the usurper
You picked the cherries from my tree
You showed such a salacious need
You didn't care how it affected me
You pushed and pushed aggressively
Your pressure melted me like wax
You erased logic, feigned facts
Self control's what your brain lacks
Now thinking back, I can't relax
Your ghost is after me
You ruined me effectively
The vines have wrapped around my waist
It gives me such a bitter taste
Why am I so cynical?
Why are you so physical?
Future lovers, please just nurture
The victim of the usurper
uh oh uh oh
uh oh uh oh
Immature is no excuse
Not when you made me feel used
You harvested, and then abused
The resources that I gave you
I'm mother nature, you're a man
Used my beach to help you tan
Said you promise to replant
Two weeks later, no you can't
Your ghost is after me
You ruined me effectively
The vines have wrapped around my waist
It gives me such a bitter taste
Why am I so cynical?
Why are you so physical?
Future lovers, please just nurture
The victim of the usurper
uh oh uh oh
uh oh uh oh
(I can see you)
(I can see you)
Is it serious?
Am I overreacting?
Is it serious?
But it's impacting
Me
Your ghost is after me
You ruined me effectively
The vines have wrapped around my waist
It gives me such a bitter taste
Why am I so cynical?
Why are you so physical?
Future lovers, please just nurture
The victim of the usurper
uh oh, uh oh
uh oh, uh oh
uh oh, uh oh
uh oh, uh oh
BONES
My eyes send burning signals to my mind
When I see what I need all the time
But I want to not need to be fed
Despite knowing I'd end up dead
(Go further, get thinner)
(Skip lunch, skip dinner)
(Don't fucking touch that)
(You're being a brat)
It wants me to be empty
The mirror's lying to me
All my thoughts are stones
Let me show my bones
I have to not show my bones
I hide my meals in shame from every eye
When I am asked if I'm hungry I just lie
Nobody will believe me cause I look fine
Lately my mind feels like it isn't mine
(Every bite makes you look much worse)
(Look pretty even if you end up in a hearse)
(Suck it in until it stays, I'll tear your soul apart)
(When you eat, I will break your fragile little heart)
It wants me to be empty
The mirror's lying to me
All my thoughts are stones
Let me show my bones
I have to not show my bones
I'm so cold
I'm so tired
All the food
Has expired
I wanna shrink away
It's too hard to stay
Here in my brain
My body brings me pain
Just give me a break
Just give me a break
It's more than I can take
It's more than I can take
It wants me to be empty
The mirror's lying to me
All my thoughts are stones
Let (make) me show my bones
It wants me to be empty
The mirror's lying to me
All my thoughts are stones
I can't show my bones
I have to not show my bones
eulogy
Morsels of memories sit on my plate
It was gone too soon
You were my ephemeral everything
Hope I'm over it by June
Hope it's in a better place now
Instead of where we were
Hope I feel better somehow
I beg to find a cure
White fluorescent hallways
But I want someone to love me always
Knitted white blanket over us
Watching films on week nights
But what's comfort if there's no trust?
I'm tired of delusional fights
Loving you's hell, so we must be there
Almost bleeding from the pain
Left my tears streaming for hours, I swear
You're immature, and now I'm insane
White fluorescent hallways
But I want someone to love me always
I wanna trust you
But the countless empty promises tell me no
I can't fucking fix you
You're kind and rude and smart and dumb and so
I’ll let it stay buried
I won’t dig it up
But I’ll grieve it
Goodbye to this love
Goodbye, goodbye
Goodbye to this love
Goodbye, goodbye
Goodbye to this love
Morsels of memories sit on my plate
It was gone too soon
You were my ephemeral everything
Hope I'm over it by June
the archive (I will)
I've heard your dirty talk
You've held me in bed
We've had to look at the clock
We'd go shower like you said
We've been up close and personal
In several different places
I'd say the rest but it's a mouthful
I'd see yours in a crowd of faces
It's hard to hang with you now that we're friends
Cause I have seen you with no pants or shirt on
It's hard to hear "what's up" when we've slept in the same bed
Cause I have missed awaking next to you at dawn
Though it pains me all the time to be friends
And how it hurts when I just want to pretend
But I need you in my world still
I just need some time to heal
and then I will
We've seen each other nude
Fogging your glasses making out
Now you're just another dude
But the flashbacks are far too loud
It's hard to hang with you now that we're friends
Cause I have seen you with no pants or shirt on
It's hard to hear "what's up?" when we've slept in the same bed
Cause I have missed awaking next to you at dawn
Though it pains me all the time to be friends
And how it hurts when I just want to pretend
But I need you in my world still
I just need some time to heal
and then I will
Good and bad, you have affected me, it's sad
Times we had, I'm too depressed to be mad
Every time, my mind just takes a dive
In our life, takes out files from our archive
I can't put them away
I can't put them away
(Away) It's hard to hang with you now that we're friends
Cause I have seen you with no pants or shirt on
It's hard to hear "what's up?" when we've slept in the same bed
Cause I have missed awaking next to you at dawn
Though it pains me all the time to be friends
And how it hurts when I just want to pretend
But I need you in my world still
I just need some time to heal
and then I will
boy friend
I forgive you for the harm you caused
You made it up to me when we paused
Being friends with an ex is crazy
But it just takes work, no being lazy
I know you're holding your breath
But this song won't cause you death
I'm not angry anymore
Took a half a year but I'm closing that door
You might be a bad boyfriend
But hey that doesn't mean that I want us to end
I'm not angry anymore
Only took some tears but hey, I love you to my core
It was pretty hard to mend
But hey, you're doing way better as a normal friend
I forgive you for the stupid fights
Self righteousness thinking you were right
Everyone makes mistakes in college
Staying friends wasn't one, I acknowledge
I know you're holding your breath
But this song won't cause you death
I'm not angry anymore
Took a half a year, but I'm closing that door
You might be a bad boyfriend
But hey that doesn't mean that I want us to end
I'm not angry anymore
Only took some tears but hey, I love you to my core
It was pretty hard to mend
But hey, you're doing way better as a normal friend
I love you so much
Just don't ever touch
Me below the waist again
My time is precious, don't waste it
Maybe one day when we are old
If you've changed, then don't be cold
If nothing else has worked out then
We could try again, but until then, we should just be friends
I'm not angry anymore
Took a half a year, but I'm closing that door
You might be a bad boyfriend
But hey that doesn't mean that I want us to end
I'm not angry anymore
Only took some tears but hey, I love you to my core
It was pretty hard to mend
But hey, you're doing way better as a normal friend
EXIT
I wish people noticed when I leave the room
I wish people acted like they care if I'm in a tomb
Freaking out, staying proud
Voices loud, too much doubt
There's always someone better
So my eyes always get redder
I just fold
I'm so cold
I can't go on
All my motivation's gone
The world's gone to shit
In hell, we'll all be lit
I don't belong here
I don't belong anywhere
I'm so cold
Where is the exit?
I'm dizzy, head is foggy
I'm tired, brain is soggy
Guess two salads isn't enough
Being alive is way too rough
Pocket knives, hiding red lines
On my thighs, must serve me right
Corsets, salads, measure tape
Binging, starving, I gain weight
All ruined my teenage hood
All I tried to be was good
I can't go on
All my motivation's gone
The world's gone to shit
In hell, we'll all be lit
I don't belong here
I don't belong anywhere
I'm so cold
Where is the exit?
I'm alone most of the time
My presence worth only a dime
I wish people noticed when I leave the room
So I go
Where?
Where is the exit?
I need the exit
Where is my exit?
Where where where where?
Where where where where?
I can't go on
All my motivation's gone
The world's gone to shit
In hell, we'll all be lit
I don't belong here
I don't belong anywhere
I'm so cold
Where is the exit?
